Well I get to go on vacation in a week.

I’m not sure I remember the last vacation I took. It had to have been one I took 2-3 years ago. We went to Florida where I learned several rather important things: 1) Florida bugs are so large they should be forced to pay taxes. I’ve seen helicopters smaller than those things. 2.) If you don’t like a person that you spend very little time with, you’ll more than likely find yourself homicidal after being forced to stay in a hotel room with them. 3.) An amusement parks in Florida during the summer are very similar to a modern day form of torture. By the time you’re done, you’re ready to kick the next large furry creature in the head that tries to get between you and anything air-conditioned.

I had a good time during that vacation. I have to admit that I almost always have a good time on a vacation. I don’t care if I have to force people to have fun at gunpoint, we’ll have some fun. I don’t know how I couldn’t enjoy myself just because I get to be away from home for a while. I think that’s for two reasons. I’ve never quite grown up, and being away always gives me a sense of freedom, and being away from home gives me a reason to forget about problems that might be waiting for me. They go straight to the backburner.

Anyway, I’ll be heading to Reno with a few lunatics I’ve met online. I’m quite sure that their all the harmless kind of insane, but if you don’t hear from me for a month or so I’m either wandering the desert lost, or I won a million in blackjack. Have you ever met someone you know online? It’s a strange experience. You know them... hell you talk to them all the time. Yet you’re faced with a stranger. The beauty is that you’ve already decided what you think about them by who they are. How freeing to not have to worry about superficial crap.

So I’m glad to be going on a trip soon. It’s been way too long since I just had some worry free fun.

“VACATION: Two weeks on the sunny sands - and the rest of the year on the financial rocks.” -- Sam Ewing

Idiocy on parade...

You can have all the education in the world and still be completely stupid. If you doubt me, I have proof. Last night I was driving to PetsMart trying to buy a bowl that weighed more than a house. Why? Because I’m really tired of the puppy picking up her bowl and moving it over to wherever I am to eat. It wouldn’t be so bad if she didn’t leave a trail behind her. My theory is she just wants to remember where to put it back. For the most part she’s self cleaning, and goes back to pick up the trail. Sadly, she doesn’t do a very good job of it so I end up stepping on them late at night while trying to get some water.... but I digress.

Anyway while driving, I passed a brand new Mercedes SUV. The license place said, “ER DOC”. Inside with the light on was a lovely woman.... a lovely busy one. She had the nerve to be driving while reading a medical chart, and talking on her cell phone. How dumb can you be? It’s not like she doesn’t see enough accidents in her ER to know better....

That’s not to say I’m immune from stupidity... far from it. This morning I was talking to my mother... which can be a chore at times in and of itself... and actually found myself offering to cook the Thanksgiving turkey. I tried this last year.... you’d think I’d learn. Last year my brother and I had the grand idea to cook the turkey on the grill. Anyone who knows me knows that an open flame and I are a dangerous combination. There was only a small fire that time... thank god. And at least half the turkey was edible, if you didn’t mind the crunch. But here I was once again offering to burn the house down and mutilate a poor turkey.

None of us are immune from stupidity... I just try to keep it behind close doors and not in a moving vehicle. I’ll just keep it between me, my family, my friends, and the city’s fire department.

“The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits” -- Albert Einstein